So I’m driving through Indianapolis and I get behind a white Ford Bronco. Now, if you’re as old as I am or at least close, when I say the words “white Ford Bronco” your memory streams back to 1994 when the World’s most famous white Ford Bronco made its debut.
The one to which I refer (note the correct English there) is the one driven by Al Cowlings as he toted OJ Simpson around the freeway system of Los Angeles on June 17, 1994. They were running from the police as OJ was suspected of a double murder.
I remember exactly where I was and where I watched the chase and exactly where I stood when the trial verdict was ultimately read. At the time, only the space shuttle Challenger had created a more indelible memory in my mind. It was the Kennedy assassination of its day.
So I get the humor behind this plate. I really do. But the question remains….why does this man still have this plate? Or this vehicle for that matter? At some point, it got old. My guess is 1996ish. Now, I try to incorporate new material in my stand-up act when I can. This man has had over 18 years to come up with something else. Some other witty vanity plate. Here’s three I just thought of for him in twelve seconds:
“UNCREATV” or “PRANOID” or “LVKRDSHIAN”
I checked the Indiana DMV website. Right now, it costs $48 for a vanity plate ANNUALLY. To date, this guy has ponied up $864 dollars for the lamest license plate in the history of the world. Of course you’re not OJ! Normal people would never make that mistake, fat white guy. Maybe he lives in fear of being pulled over and put in jail for killing his ex-wife and her friend because he actually did. Who’s to say?
All I know is that this plate represents what’s wrong with America. Laziness. This man would rather pay $864 (and counting) than either sit and think of a new plate or admit that his joke has gotten old.
PS to the driver: Your car doesn’t even have a white top like the one OJ was in.